If you could start your life all over what would be different? What would you change now if you were able to wave a magic wand and start from scratch?
Just imagine you have no ties, no burdens, no limits, no memories, and no past.
What would your life look like? If the answer that comes to your mind is different than what you are doing, why is that? Is it because of someone else's opinion? A spouse, a parent - or maybe your children?
The ultimate test of your life is to close your eyes and think of yourself on your deathbed. Lying there, preparing yourself to leave, look back at your life as you are currently living it.
How do you feel? Are you satisfied you lived completely? Or do you wish you had done differently? Very few of our senior citizens look back on their life and say, "I sure wish I had spent more time at the office!" Nobody says, "I wish I had watched more TV!"
This is what they say. "I wish I had been bolder. I wish I had given more. I wish I had tried harder to see more, do more and feel more." People wish that they had lived more.
I, for one, have to admit to a certain amount of holding back on dreams and goals because of our two boys. As my life progresses I realize there is no reason to hold back.
We have not been exactly standing still either. We have done our best to live our dreams. We built a sailboat and sailed for 7 years traveling on the open ocean. We lived in the snow in Aspen Colorado, and on the beach in South Carolina. An old brick mill was our home in Long Island, versus a boat dock in Palm Beach Florida. We are writers of books and music, actors in the theater, and we home- school the boys. We have built a horse farm, and businesses! Yet, there is so much more we want to do!
It is a balancing act. We all must have sufficient finances to support a comfortable lifestyle, (although most of us tend to spend way too much on that!) Part of this balancing act is understanding what we are passionate about doing so that work becomes a joy instead of a job.
Is this not a major reason of lost dreams and goals? Many people find work, call it a job and make a living at it. But they begrudge every minute of it, going as far as using the job as a reason for playing the martyr. Find something else!
There are many, many teachers of the attraction philosophies of "making a life". With as many opportunities today in every field imaginable, somewhere, something is calling to you.
Another part of the balancing act is to include those around you in frank and open discussions in what it is you want. I find some of my coaching clients have kept their wants and needs bottled up inside them forever! They had already decided for the other person in their lives there was no interest in whatever it was they themselves wanted to do! How absurd! How can we possibly know what someone else wants!
Would it not be tragic to spend your life in a big city for 40 years, working at a job you despise because you thought your spouse liked it, even though you wanted to live in the country and be a farmer? Then one day you overhear your spouse tell her best friend all she ever wanted to do was live in the country? 40 years!
Sure this is a bit far fetched - but you would be amazed at what I hear!
Make an attempt today to start with a brand new page of your life. Create your life story how you want it. If there are others in your life to be involved, have them do the same exercise. Then compare what your notes. If this matches your current life, congratulations! You are one of the few. Now make it better.
However, if your written life stories sound like someone completely different, then you are living a life of conflict.
Here is the good news. Your life is your life. No one can take that away from you. You are not indentured. You are not a slave. You are free to go, do, and be whomever you wish.
It might not be easy, but it sure might be worth it. I coach people daily who are changing their lives. There are so many things to be grateful for, and so many things open to us. We owe it to all the ones before us who gave us this opportunity to take advantage of it.